


...Then Comes the Baby in the Baby Carriage

by Kara (magelette)



Category: Wonderfalls
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-12-23
Updated: 2009-12-23
Packaged: 2017-10-05 02:30:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/36820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magelette/pseuds/Kara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sharon swore that the old nursery rhyme was mocking her... Everyone knew it took a man *and* a woman...</p>
            </blockquote>





	...Then Comes the Baby in the Baby Carriage

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Chester Femme](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Chester+Femme).



Sharon stared at the pee-stick. Stared again. Wondered if someone else had somehow hacked into her bathroom and switched out the urine in the toilet bowl with her own – Little Feather wasn't beyond that. Luckily, she'd bought the pregnancy tests in bulk at BJ's, so it wasn't like she couldn't just pee on another. Circumstantial evidence was just that – circumstantial. She needed definitive proof.

At least this might mean that Aaron would stop yapping about Jaye, of all people, being the Second Coming. What religion were they this week? Episcopal?

Lesbians don't get pregnant, and it didn't take both a BA and a JD for Sharon to know that you needed both a man and a woman for something like this. Still, the first test could be wrong. Or the second. Or the third. Four times a charm, right? Right?

She wasn't sure what was worse: Jaye's constant questioning about Sharon being a lesbian, or her mother's undeniable glee at finding out that she was going to become a grandmother, missing son-in-law aside. At least it would take Mom's mind off of Aaron and Mahandra for the moment, not that she hadn't considered Mahandra a third daughter anyway. Well, their adopted daughter, since they couldn't exactly blame Mahandra on the mailman. Or the UPS guy. God, like that UPS guy that Jaye had tried to set Sharon up with who ended up being Beth's ex-husband, or whatever. Maybe they could blame this on Beth's ex-husband. Maybe they found the baby on the doorstep. Or maybe she had a tumor that was just mimicking pregnancy hormones to fool the pregnancy test. Little Feather was probably behind this. Being the new shaman for the tribe, her ass...

"Sharon?" Beth. Shit! Beth wasn't supposed to be home yet. And how the hell was Sharon supposed to hide six used pregnancy tests, all of which had happy little blue plus signs that all but mocked Sharon. Maybe Jaye was right about that whole inanimate object-mocking thing. Maybe objects really did have souls. And maybe her sister really was Jesus reincarnated. Shit!

The doorknob rattled. "Sweetie? You're not sick, are you? Because we have the evening off and I found the edible chocolate body paint..." God, Beth's fingers, and her mouth, and the body paint and... Sharon groaned. Were pregnant women supposed to eat chocolate? Were pregnant women supposed to...?

She wasn't pregnant! No matter what six tests said. It was a conspiracy set up by the health care industry, anyway, out to frighten single women. She wondered if there was a potential law suit here somewhere...

Sharon swept the little peed-on-sticks into the trash and tied up the bag in the can. That would take care of it. Throwing the door open, she gave Beth her biggest, most innocent smile and a kiss. "Just cleaning out the bathroom! You know how neurotic I get after lunch with my mother."

Beth actually grinned at that. "Not only neurotic... Something about you, all high-strung and agitated..." Beth's painted fingernails traced a path down Sharon's buttoned blouse, playing with each individual button. Sharon couldn't help moaning.

"Did I mention... Tom stopped by? He wanted to talk... or something?" Those fingertips snuck in and out of the gaps between buttons, tickling softly, and rubbing just... the right... way.

"Tom and I have nothing to talk about," Beth said, snaking an arm around Sharon and pulling her in for a searing kiss. "It's all about us, baby."

"Baby?" Sharon squeaked, pulling away. "Who said anything about a—"

Her words were drowned out with a kiss.

She needed more concrete evidence. Nothing to worry about just yet, since it was probably some kind of hormonal imbalance...


End file.
